8 Steps To Empowered Voices
There is a lot going on in a child’s mind when a new brother or sister enters the family through fostering or adoption. Even the most talkative children often are at a loss for words about some of their big feelings. It’s hard to express complex perceptions, thoughts, and feelings.
And honestly? It’s hard for parents to decode their messages through a filter of their own biases, beliefs, feelings, motives, and life experiences. There is a lot going on which can make good communication in complex families like yours so challenging.
Active Listening Skills Are Vital
Active listening can be defined as suspending judgment in what you hear and being fully present with another person to understand his or her experience or point of view. This involves hearing more than the words of your child but tapping into the deeper meanings, unspoken needs, and all the feelings conveyed. I call this “empowering voices” – creating an environment of respect that allows your children to express themselves fully. “Empowering voices” makes it safe for them to express their deeper feelings and needs that they might be hesitant to share. Empowered listening is how you:
- Establish deeper connections
- Build trust, rapport, and goodwill
- Acquire vital information that makes you better at parenting
- Overcome friction and conflict
- Promote learning, growth, and even healing
If you’ve ever had a conversation with someone who was fully present and engaged then you know how wonderful that made you feel. Now you can be that kind of listener for your children.
The ability to empower your child’s voice is the heart of all healthy parent-child relationships. There are few more valuable gifts you can give your children than a willingness and ability to listen deeply and encourage them to speak up.
Most of us parents are not great at this
Busy parents tend to:
- Get distracted by all the things that need to be attended to
- Interpret what child say through our own biases, feelings, motives, experiences
- Tune out because we don’t think it’s really that big of a deal
- Focus on our response rather than hearing them out
- Shut down messages we don’t want to hear
- Hear the words only and not the deeper needs or meaning conveyed
- Take over the conversation by our comments and questions
- Offer solutions and “quick fixes”
- Try to make them feel better rather than letting them work through their experience
What You Will Get Out of This Course
By going through 8 Steps to Empowering Voices, you’ll come away understanding the importance of resident children being able to speak up for their own needs in foster and adoptive families. You’ll come away knowing how to listen well and build much more powerful relationships with your children.
I’m excited about this course because I know firsthand the significant change for the better that using these skills I’ll teach you have done for improving relationships with my own children. I can tell you that I didn’t always listen well. These skills are not difficult to learn and you can begin immediately to improve the communication culture in your family, too. It’s truly never too late.
By going through this course, you’ll learn the most important influencing skill you can have as a parent; the thing that will make all the difference in the world to how well your resident children can adjust to all the changes that come to them when the family fosters or adopts.
The Course Format has eight sections:
- Goal Setting
- How’s My Communication
- What’s My Message?
- Am I Distracted?
- Get On Their Level
- What’s Their Love Language?
- Am I Listening Well?
- Does My Child Need More Connection?
- Where Do We Go From Here?
